Kaleb “Kay” Penfield

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February 19, 2001–January 24, 2025

Kaleb Kenneth “Kay” Penfield(they/them) died peacefully on Friday, Jan. 24, 2025.  They were surrounded by family and friends as they gave the ultimate gift of organ donation to provide life for others.  

This is how Kay lived their life: to help others, to be a voice for those who needed one, to advocate for those who needed support.  Yet, at the same time, Kay was fighting their own demons and was unable to find peace over the last seven years.  

Kay was born on February 19, 2001, in Mauston, Wisconsin to parents Ken and Pam Penfield.  They were joined by siblings Brady, Conner, and Gabbie in 2003.  The triplets were “their babies” at the time and Kay would always greet visitors at the door to introduce them.  

At an early age, Kay showed a voracious desire to learn and read all that they could.  Bedtime meant reading from their “Animal Encyclopedia” and other books that piqued their interest.  Kay loved going on walks, collecting rocks, playing with their trains, especially Thomas the Tank Engine, or watching Disney Movies…their favorites were 101 Dalmaldations as Kay called them, and Monsters Inc. by Pixar.  

Kay started playing soccer in PreK and continued up to High School.  They built many friendships and was always known by coaches as a knowledgeable and dedicated player who was always “coachable”.   As a parent, the latter meant a lot to hear from coaches.  

It was when Kay started 4K in Mauston that their knowledge and hunger for learning blossomed and continued in Waunakee when they started 2nd Grade.  Kay had a ferocious quest for knowledge in history and geography.  It seemed that they had a photographic memory and could recall facts in an instant.  We credit much of their success to teachers from elementary through high school for challenging this quest for knowledge.  

Kay graduated from Waunakee High School in 2019 and started college at UW Madison to major in Philosophy.  Initially, they prospered in the keen knowledge that was readily available and fit their interests.  However, the demons of depression and anxiety reared their forces again and became too much.  They moved back home to get on solid ground and support.

At home, Kay became a versed cook, “the family chef,” especially vegan meals which was their lifestyle choice. Many meals were shared with friends and family.  This seemed to be their new passion.  Unfortunately, with the lack of services readily available for mental health issues, Kay was unable to find peace within and wanted to release themself from pain.  

Kay was preceded in death by their paternal grandparents, Ted and Nicky Penfield.  

They are survived by their parents Ken and Pam Penfield (Maier), siblings  Brady, Conner, and Gabbie Penfield & Willy Arce (Gabbie’s boyfriend), maternal grandparents La Verne and Rose Ann Maier of Waunakee, uncles and aunts: Kim Yamamoto, Pam and Dean Hamann, Tedd and Laurie Penfield, Bob and Lisa Maier,  Ron Maier and Jessica Gommel, Rick and Dawn Maier,  Ryan and Carie Maier, along with numerous cousins from the Penfield, Maier, and Hamann families.  Kay will especially be missed by their furry brother and sister, Bogey and Moka.    

While we are deeply saddened at the loss of our child, we know that their organ donation gift will help others. Please hug your loved ones.  Check in on them.  Don’t be afraid to have those difficult conversations.   You never know what battles a person may be waging in their mind.  Mental health is a real disease, and we need to remove the stigma that goes along with that diagnosis and battle that many wage but keep inside.  

Pam and I cannot thank the UW Trauma and Life Support Center (TLC) enough for their compassion and help on this difficult journey.  They are truly second to none and Angels on Earth.  Every staff member we encountered was professional, nurturing, compassionate and ensured that Kay and the rest of us were being cared for.  

Be kind.  Be caring.  Understand that others may be different, but still deserve love, compassion, and acceptance.  

The Garrity Funeral Home of Prairie du Chien is assisting the family. www.garrityfuneralhome.com.

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